On Relationships...

If you can love something today and hate it tomorrow, is it love?

The situations that currently exist between man and woman today - our relationships - can be peaceful now and conflict later; full of love today and full of hate tomorrow. This kind of thing is the fruit of external regulation/expectation and is not love or true relationship. It is essentially what is produced when one tries to conform his/her circle to fit into another's square. Something dark takes place...judgment,condemnation,etc. We must understand that when we blame or accuse another, we are actually projecting the imbalance that exists within ourselves.What if instead of trying to correct another, we sought to correct ourselves? What if every human prescribed to this Wisdom? Very few people know what relationship really is. It is one of the most misused words in the English language, next to the word Love. Like the term Christian, "relationship" is subject to the agreements made by the person(s) controlling the situation. But what today's human refers to as relationship is really codependency. If there is something specific that I am gaining from another person then I deem it a good relationship...but if I cannot mold another's modus operandi into mine, or if my thoughts cannot be conformed to the exact thoughts of another, then the relationship is labeled a bad one. But a true relationship is not affected by one person's agreeing or disagreeing with another. Relationship is a paradigm beyond likes and dislikes...beyond good and bad, and is not subject to duality in the same way that truth is not subject to duality. Relationship is independent of the personality, just as truth and love are independent of the personality. We are constantly working on our personality...working to become more honest, more loving, more present, more conscious, more aware. The wise in spirit always start with SELF to complete such spiritual work. How can one change another when he/she cannot change themselves? The wise in spirit do not accuse others, for in doing so they expose and feed their own fears. We must meditate daily and look within our own selves to find peace and create the internal space for forgiveness of others.Once we find our internal core and our spiritual "funnel" is in tact, then true healing in our relationships can take place...and real relationships can be formed. In our society, the family unit is almost extinct. Damaged relationships have become the new normal. Everyone says, "I do whatever I want to do" or "Do YOU because I'm doing ME!" which means that there is no need for accountability or even responsibility...Our culture feeds on lawlessness because its easy, but not really.Ethics, honesty, discernment, forgiveness all require wisdom...learning the latest features on the iphone or Facebook does not. How, then, can we start to build true, meaningful relationships??? Well, lets start today. right now. In meditation. When time permits TODAY, join me and email me your meditation testimony at kreativepilar@gmail.com. I'd love to hear and share. 

Meditation for Busy People

"By meditation upon light and upon radiance, 

knowledge of the spirit can be reached 

and peace can be achieved."

Patanjali, 300B.C.

• Change into loose,comfy clothing so that your sitting is not restricted in any way
• Find a quiet place where you will not be disturbed
• Sit comfy on the ground, with your legs outstretched or crossed
• Close your eyes and concentrate on relaxing each part of your body
• Begin at the tips of your toes and envision the blood flowing throughout your body to the top of  your head, the Crown Chakra (Sanskrit) or your Ori (Yoruba).
• Once you are focused on your blood flow, tune in to your breathing pattern.
• Breathe in through your nose (if possible) and out through your mouth, making an "Ohhh"or "Ahhh"sound as you exhale.
• Once your breathing is regulated, channel your attention towards your thoughts and feelings. Let them roam free for a while in your mind, 1 to 2 minutes.
• Next, capture your thoughts and move them to the outer space of your mind. This is called "Clear Your Canvas" meditation. 
• Expeditiously push all thoughts that race for the center of your mind to the outer edges, far left/far right,etc.
• Try to focus on your clear canvas, that is, the pure space in the center of your mind, entertaining no thoughts that try to invade that space.
• Keeping calm and still, continue this exercise for 2 to 5 minutes. 
• Once you reach your calm space, begin to envision positive affirmations on your canvas. Read them, think on them, believe them. Some of my favorite affirmations that directly affect/improve my ability to relate with others are :
• "I am patient and becoming more patient everyday."
• "I give love. I receive love. I am love."
• "Everything is good." (This one I chant throughout the day. Works like a charm!)
• "I forgive so that I may be forgiven" 

Peace be unto you.

Montrose Morning Meditation

The parts of my life tell a story-

it was meant to be told.

My tale is a glass menagerie of memories old..

 memories new...

innervisions of an innercity girl that somehow came true.

My right foot pivots on the shoulder blade of time.

I AM LIFE in the same way that ten cents is a dime.

(It's all about perspective)

I sit here in quiet fear

of the waves that rush against the shore;

caught between a rock and a hard place,

I SEE less but FEEL more.

The world is so cold but there is SUN in my core,

for I am rich in God's love though my pockets feel poor.

Like the four corners of the earth,

I give birth to freedom!

I carry the children in my crown

so the enemy cannot see them!

And when the winds of war blow swiftly I take up my wings and soar...

beyond the moon, above the stars, flying free through heaven's door.

Lost yet Found

"For some, getting lost is not a matterof geography so much as identity.

A passionate desire, an urgent need, to become no one and anyone,

to shake off the shackles that remind you who you are and who others think you are.

Through the acute perception of the nuances of consciousness, 

the dissolution of identity can not onlybefound in foreign places and remote fastnesses, 

but also in a stroll down the street,

a moment's solitude in an armchair, 

a drive across town,

or sitting quietly at the lakefront."

~R.Solnit

"Not til we are completely lost, or turned around (for a man needs only to be turned around once with his eyes shut in this world to be lost), do we appreciate the vastness and strangeness of nature.

Not til we are lost in other worlds,

not til we have lost the world do we begin to find ourselves

and realize where we are and the infinite extent of our relations.

What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world

and loses his soul?"

~Thoreau

"Not to find one'sway in a city may well be uninteresting and banal.

It requires ignorance, nothing more...

but to lose one's self in a city - as one loses one's self in a forest -

that calls for quite a different schooling. 

To lose yourself is a voluptuous surrender;

lost in your arms, lost to the world, 

utterly immersed in what is present so that it's surroundings fade away. 

To be lost is to be fully present,

and to be fully present is to be capable of being in uncertainty and mystery...

One does not get lost, but loses one's self

with the implication that it is a conscious choice,

a chosen surrender,

a psychic state achievable thru more than physical geography.

That thing the nature of which is totally unknown to you 

is usually what you need to find, 

and finding it...finding it is simply a matter of getting...lost."

~Unknown

"Infant Eyes" by Doug & Jean Carn

I Loooooove this song...

It is good for mothers who meditate on their children...

it exudes protection, love, motherhood...

I would sit by candlelight when my children were young 

and put this song on repeat once they were fast asleep. 

My mommy meditation time.

She sings, "A looooooooooooove that never dies, 

for my dear infant eyes..."

There were times in which I might even shed a tear over such pure melodic beauty that seemed to kiss my ears. 

Her words somehow identified with 

my innermost thoughts 

& concerns like magic,

Jean Carnes milky smooth voice would dance around the room, missing no corners,

flowing through my soul, 

mother to mother...woman to woman.

This is one that I will keep in rotation forever.

I dedicate it to my womb seeds,

Christopher, Vashti & Ayden...

My earthly seeds,

Mahogany, Malachi & Meaghan...

and the precious seeds everywhere.

 <3 Kreative Pilar

Clear Your Canvas Meditation

Every human should have some alone time each day. For many of us the idea seems daunting and/or eerily unattainable. From housework to homework, a lack of time or a lack of funds...both "career woman" and homemaker alike barely have enough energy at the end of the day for anything reluctantly close to meditation besides sleep. I used to think that my issue was economic; that if only I had this,or that...if only I had this kind of pillow then I could sit longer, if only I had that kind of house I would be more inspired. But as a predominantly-stay-at-home mom and a parttime teaching artist on a fixed income, I quickly realized that I pretty much do and find a way to get the things that I really want. So why couldn't I seem to find more time to meditate? My problem was more of internal confusion than external lack. In fact, I was chasing my own tail. I was constantly searching for creative solitude yet I was blind to the wealth of opportunity before me to attain it. In retrospect, how inexplicable was it that I found time for community engagements, chill time with the girls, business meetings, talking on the phone and shopping, but I could not say to myself, "Self, you cannot partake because you NEED to spend time with self?" To tell my friends I decline talking because I just need to be alone almost seems rude and even implies that something is wrong or strange. What does it say about our society that one has to foster excuses for practicing silence? My quiet times are among the most relevant times of my life; the only times I am able to be completely present in my own head. Just as the Artist must be alone to birth his creation and the writer alone to unearth his thoughts, I must be alone at times to renew my mind and relax my spirit. In the midst of a quiet spirit, we can find that single strand in the middle of the web...that axis in the center of the wheel. As a wombman, for example, in my quiet space I find the middle ground between my relationships, my craft and my numerous obligations. Once we find that comfortable quiet room in the black of our minds, the next step is learning to still the spirit in the midst of our hectic lives. The work we do within directly affects our quality of life without. Join Me:

Meditation for Busy People

"By meditation upon light and upon radiance, 

knowledge of the spirit can be reached 

and peace can be achieved."

Patanjali, 300B.C.

• Change into loose,comfy clothing so that your sitting is not restricted in any way
• Find a quiet place where you will not be disturbed
• Sit comfy on the ground, with your legs outstretched or crossed
• Close your eyes and concentrate on relaxing each part of your body
• Begin at the tips of your toes and envision the blood flowing throughout your body to the top of  your head, the Crown Chakra (Sanskrit) or your Ori (Yoruba).
• Once you are focused on your blood flow, tune in to your breathing pattern.
• Breathe in through your nose (if possible) and out through your mouth, making an "Ohhh"or "Ahhh"sound as you exhale.
• Once your breathing is regulated, channel your attention towards your thoughts and feelings. Let them roam free for a while in your mind, 1 to 2 minutes.
• Next, capture your thoughts and move them to the outer space of your mind. This is called "Clear Your Canvas" meditation. 
• Expeditiously push all thoughts that race for the center of your mind to the outer edges, far left/far right,etc.
• Try to focus on your clear canvas, that is, the pure space in the center of your mind, entertaining no thoughts that try to invade that space.
• Keeping calm and still, continue this exercise daily until it becomes easier to reach your clear canvas. When you can sit amidst your clear canvas for 5 minutes or more, you are ready for guided meditation. ("Clear Your Canvas & Guided Meditations" tutorials coming soon.)
• Advanced Students: If you are already able to clear your canvas within a minute and sit within your clear canvas for at least 5 minutes, then choose a color for your canvas and create something in the ethereal space. Here, I often create my "To do" list for the week, "research" my next creative project, write a song/poem,or simply hold my peace for up to 15 to 20 minutes in the quiet.

Kreative Pilar

The Divine Rose 

I often decorate my sacred spaces with red roses...LOVE them...bc I am an insatiable Cancerian wombman, I dry them all to preserve their energy and hang them because I cant just throw 'em out. It's like I connect with them. But THIS rose in particular...this special lil' baby has sat atop my prayer alter for over a month now. Many challenges I have been met with over the last few weeks, but God is faithful and all trials are now water under the bridge. But THIS rose in particular...this rose that has sat on my prayer alter dried in its natural state...it did not wilt or succumb to the elements...it is as vibrant and beautiful as the day I placed it there OVER a month ago. Oh, how GOD has spoken to me this day!!! I am that rose...kept and vibrant and beautiful. I shall not wilt under the pressure of life, and remember that I am made perfect and whole in the presence of an Omnipotent, Omniscient and Omnipresent GOD. ASE.

Kreative Pilar