Saturday, January 31, 2015

On Relationships...


If you can love something today and hate it tomorrow, is it love?
The situations that currently exist between man and woman today - our relationships - can be peaceful now and conflict later; full of love today and full of hate tomorrow. This kind of thing is the fruit of external regulation/expectation and is not love or true relationship. It is essentially what is produced when one tries to conform his/her circle to fit into another's square. Something dark takes place...judgment,condemnation,etc. We must understand that when we blame or accuse another, we are actually projecting the imbalance that exists within ourselves.What if instead of trying to correct another, we sought to correct ourselves? What if every human prescribed to this Wisdom? Very few people know what relationship really is. It is one of the most misused words in the English language, next to the word Love. Like the term Christian, "relationship" is subject to the agreements made by the person(s) controlling the situation. But what today's human refers to as relationship is really codependency. If there is something specific that I am gaining from another person then I deem it a good relationship...but if I cannot mold another's modus operandi into mine, or if my thoughts cannot be conformed to the exact thoughts of another, then the relationship is labeled a bad one. But a true relationship is not affected by one person's agreeing or disagreeing with another. Relationship is a paradigm beyond likes and dislikes...beyond good and bad, and is not subject to duality in the same way that truth is not subject to duality. Relationship is independent of the personality, just as truth and love are independent of the personality. We are constantly working on our personality...working to become more honest, more loving, more present, more conscious, more aware. The wise in spirit always start with SELF to complete such spiritual work. How can one change another when he/she cannot change themselves? The wise in spirit do not accuse others, for in doing so they expose and feed their own fears. We must meditate daily and look within our own selves to find peace and create the internal space for forgiveness of others.Once we find our internal core and our spiritual "funnel" is in tact, then true healing in our relationships can take place...and real relationships can be formed. In our society, the family unit is almost extinct. Damaged relationships have become the new normal. Everyone says, "I do whatever I want to do" or "Do YOU because I'm doing ME!" which means that there is no need for accountability or even responsibility...Our culture feeds on lawlessness because its easy, but not really.Ethics, honesty, discernment, forgiveness all require wisdom...learning the latest features on the iphone or Facebook does not. How, then, can we start to build true, meaningful relationships??? Well, lets start today. right now. In meditation. When time permits TODAY, join me and email me your meditation testimony at kreativepilar@gmail.com. I'd love to hear and share. 

Meditation for Busy People
"By meditation upon light and upon radiance, 
knowledge of the spirit can be reached 
and peace can be achieved."
Patanjali, 300B.C.

  • Change into loose,comfy clothing so that your sitting is not restricted in any way
  • Find a quiet place where you will not be disturbed
  • Sit comfy on the ground, with your legs outstretched or crossed
  • Close your eyes and concentrate on relaxing each part of your body
  • Begin at the tips of your toes and envision the blood flowing throughout your body to the top of  your head, the Crown Chakra (Sanskrit) or your Ori (Yoruba).
  • Once you are focused on your blood flow, tune in to your breathing pattern.
  • Breathe in through your nose (if possible) and out through your mouth, making an "Ohhh"or "Ahhh"sound as you exhale.
  • Once your breathing is regulated, channel your attention towards your thoughts and feelings. Let them roam free for a while in your mind, 1 to 2 minutes.
  • Next, capture your thoughts and move them to the outer space of your mind. This is called "Clear Your Canvas" meditation. 
  • Expeditiously push all thoughts that race for the center of your mind to the outer edges, far left/far right,etc.
  • Try to focus on your clear canvas, that is, the pure space in the center of your mind, entertaining no thoughts that try to invade that space.
  • Keeping calm and still, continue this exercise for 2 to 5 minutes. 
  • Once you reach your calm space, begin to envision positive affirmations on your canvas. Read them, think on them, believe them. Some of my favorite affirmations that directly affect/improve my ability to relate with others are :
  • "I am patient and becoming more patient everyday."
  • "I give love. I receive love. I am love."
  • "Everything is good." (This one I chant throughout the day. Works like a charm!)
  • "I forgive so that I may be forgiven" 
Peace be unto you.